Stupid Drivers

What’s Stuck In My Head – 6 September

(AKA Yet Another Traffic Rant Edition)

It’s been a bit since my last Stuck In My Head post, and even longer since a traffic rant. So I combined both. Consider this a 2-for-1 deal. Don’t say I never gave you anything either.

I guess the area is returning to normal after our near brush with Hurricane Dorian. Today’s traffic was much heavier than it should have been. When my work schedule was moved to a half hour earlier the traffic on the way into work became much lighter. On the way home, however, is every bit as bad. The 30 minute shift allows me to miss the school buses now. That’s a beautiful thing. There is a city bus that sometimes gets in my way. I can time that bus and avoid it most days. But as we all know, city buses are not the best at time keeping. Their routes can vary by up to 10 minutes or more. Even so, this particular bus only has 3 stops before it turns off onto a side road and is out of my way.

Usually, the first of two main problems I have on the way to work are yard crews. They tend to hog the left lane and travel way under the speed limit pulling their big trailers. And since I tend to regard the speed limit as a mere suggestion, they do tend to get my dander up. The second issue are the garbage trucks. I go right past their work yard to and from work. If my timing is off and I have to stop at the traffic light at the entrance to the yard, there will be 4 or 5 trucks in front of me. But that’s not as bad as it sounds. These guys (I say guys since I’ve only seen men driving the trucks) are much better drivers than the average moron on the road with me. They tend to do the speed limit, or just over, use their turn signals, and leave space between each truck for cars to maneuver. Their biggest problem is they aren’t the quickest thing to get up to speed. Plus, it’s hard to see around them.

Now, this morning, I didn’t have any garbage trucks, no city bus, no school bus, and only one yard crew. What I did have was some work truck doing 25 MPH in the left lane (the speed limit is 45 MPH – I’m usually zipping along at 50+ MPH) with about 10 cars behind like baby ducks following mama duck, and the usual folks in the right lane turning into various parking lots, and side streets, and doing about 15 MPH.

AARRRGGGHH!!! On my next vehicle, I’m getting the Photon Torpedo option. Just blow these jerks and their vehicles into subatomic pieces.

I can hardly wait to see what traffic adventures await me on my way home today. At least it’s Friday, well, at least it’s Friday on the calendar…

What does this have to do with a song? As one of my favorite DJ’s on SiriusXM, Earle Bailey like to say; “I hope this is the only traffic you get into today”.. And this song has a permanent home in my head. Enjoy!

Peace,
B

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How’s Your Day Going??

So today has not started off all that well.  But it’s looking better.

First thing – checked my email and found that the professional genealogist I contacted to help with a search said no. She wouldn’t help me. Just referred me to someone “local”. I can’t even pay anyone to help me find ancestors.

Traffic today was super stupid. There were two guys going 30 MPH (in a 45 MPH area) side by side blocking traffic. This was planned, as they were laughing at each other and waving every time someone honked at them.  And, of course, this was in a no passing area (double yellow line).

Finally, this guy in a very large pickup truck passed them (crossing the double yellow line), pulled over to the right lane and basically just stopped.  This allowed everyone to get around the other jerk. There was much yelling and the customary middle finger salute as folks went around. I saw the passenger door on the big truck open, but no idea if someone got out to have a nice discussion with the gentleman now trapped in his vehicle. I haven’t seen any reports of an incident in that area on Twitter, so hopefully, it was settled without violence. Well, maybe just a little violence.

The next problem – the lines at McDonald’s. Only about 20 cars deep at the drive through and folks lined up out the door to get inside! Were they giving something away? I didn’t have time to sit and wait to find out. Mainly due to the idiots mentioned above that put me a good ten minutes behind schedule.

But wait! It get’s better.  The coffee pot at work is DOA. Seriously, WTF??? But I did find an old one in my bosses office, so I took it.  Hey, he’s off today. Besides, he doesn’t have a carafe for it anyway.  So coffee was finally made.

One more thing – my SiriusXM app wouldn’t load. It’s common for the app (the “official” Windows 10 version from the Micro$oft store) not to open the first time. But today, it took a good thirty minutes for it to load.

I’ll tell you, a day without coffee and no tunes? No chance. I would have gone home.

So, how’s your day going?

Peace,
B

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Let’s Butcher Another Song, Shall We?

This morning on the way to work (later than usual due to a morning doctor’s appointment) I tweeted this:

tweet

Yes, I was once again stuck behind non-driving fools. The guy in the left lane even had the right turn signal on, for about 2 miles, and then turned left, with the right blinker still blinking away! #SMH

I do have a problem with the song I parody in the tweet. It gives clowns a bad name! As a registered clown, I take a bit of umbrage on this point. But I’ll let it slide because the video is just so trippy!

crop clown makeup.jpg

Skeeter the clown. (ca. 1982)

Peace,
B

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Two More Observations

Yeah, I know.. Two posts in one day? Just who the hell does he think he is?

So on the way home tonight I saw a very funny sight. The car in front of me was a hatchback Volkswagen. I don’t know the exact model since all the identifying items had been removed, but not the big VW logo. The car had been lowered, with the usual too wide wheels and tires, and had the standard exhaust work so fond of the “street racer” types. All it really does it make it sound like Wifey’s® battery operated corkscrew. Yes, we have a battery operated corkscrew. But only for Wifey’s® wine, my craft beer has no need of a corkscrew. I do, however, have at least seven bottle openers all throughout the house and porches. Gotta be prepared you know.

So, back to the story.  On the rear window of this silly little vehicle someone (or someones) had written in the dust (I doubt anyone could see out the window it was so dirty) “Sleepy Boyz” and decorated it was four very large penises. The occupants of the vehicle seemed to be totally oblivious to the artwork. I wonder if the dirty deed was done while someone was passed out in the car.

Needless to say, I was laughing at them the whole time they were in front of me.

The second observation is once again, a personalized license plate.  But this one I actually liked. It read “NONUKES 1”. I actually hope there are more of the “No Nukes” folks out and about. That is something I can agree with.

So, in honor of “No Nukes”, here is “Plutonium Is Forever” by John Hall from the 1979 “No Nukes” concert. I have that album somewhere….

Peace,
B

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An Observation

So, this morning on the way into work, I saw a personalized license plate on a car (and we all know what I think of folks with personalized plates), that said “SORARE 2”.  I read that as “So Rare 2”. Which begs the question, if you are “So Rare” how can there be two of you? Wouldn’t that be “Kinda Rare” or “Just A Bit Rare”? I wonder how many more “So Rare” folks are hiding in plain sight.

But in reality, all I wanted to do was post a video, and I needed something to open with, so I thank the “So Rare” movement.

The video I’d like to post may just be a bit rare to some.  It’s from 1970, which was like a lifetime ago. The singer is one of my favorite female artists, Melanie. The song is “Lay Down (Candles In The Rain)”.

The song came about after Melanie was one of only three solo female artists to play the Woodstock festival. Although she was basically an unknown at the time, the crowd so enjoyed her music they lit up candles, lighters, matches, or whatever they could to show their appreciation, and that inspired this song. I especially love the opening of the song. It has, to me a least, a very Celtic feel. Plus Melanie’s voice is so cool.

So here it is;

Peace,
B

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Tips From Skeeters Driving School

Yes, another traffic rant. Sorry, not sorry. For any newcomers to the blog, feel free to search for the other traffic rants, there are several.

Here is a video that sums up most of my feelings. But it’s not the video I wanted of Gallagher. He has a short routine about that subject, which we’ll discuss after the video. This is from 1988, so some of the references are a bit dated, but the thoughts are still spot on.

What I want to talk about this time, is what to do when you’re in a left turn lane but can’t make the turn yet. Gallagher has a very nice routine about it, but I couldn’t find just a clip of it.

This is the way I was taught, and I know many of my family members were taught this way as well. Hell, even my mother knew this was the way to do it.

When you’re the first one in the left turn lane your supposed to get your ass out into the middle of the intersection. You have a green light, therefore you have a right to be in the intersection. This will accomplish several things, first it allows the car behind you to also get his/her ass out into the intersection, and second, it allows car #3 to get their front wheels up and over the stop bar. This way when the light turns yellow, all three cars can make the left.  You really need to see the routine, as Gallagher’s physical mannerisms make it so funny.

I hope this is a lesson you can take with you. Because if I have one more moron stopped at the stop bar and not even trying to turn left when there’s a break in traffic… Well, let’s just say it won’t be pretty.

Peace,
B

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