(With apologies to The Barenaked Ladies)
Well, I’ve made it one whole week. And what a week it was. As I’ve posted before, the job is causing lots of stress right now. To quote one of my favorite movies;
Last night we took the girls for Mexican food. Somehow I had the will power to just have a glass of water and not a Negro Modelo as I usually have with Mexican. It didn’t help the heartburn any though. Today’s grocery shopping will be even more difficult when walking down the beer aisle.
Which leads to this. Lots of folks have told me when you quit drinking lots of “good” things happen.
- You’ll sleep better. Bullshit. I have had more weird dreams in the last week than the rest of my life combined. It used to be if I dreamed, I didn’t remember them when I awoke. Now, the weirdness just keeps following me all day long. Most of the dreams seem to put me back in the military, but I don’t recognize the locations. One dream was supposed to have the whole family back in Fort Greely. It was very lush, with palm trees and other tropical like vegetation. Problem is, Ft. Greely is in Alaska. Damn near the middle of Alaska. It’s rather remote (89 miles to the closest McDonalds when we were there). It did reach 95F one summer, for about 15 minutes. But it was usually about -50F. Needless to say there is no lush tropical vegation. In fact all there is are gnarled pine trees. And not much snow as it was to cold to snow. Yes that’s a real thing. Too damn cold to snow.
- Your digestion will be better. Again, not true. I have had the worst heartburn for the last week. Now this may have a different cause. My insurance will no long send me Nexium for the usual $9 co-pay, it went up to $40. But, I can get a generic brand for free. So I gave my doctor the list of alternative choices and she picked one. I started that one about two weeks ago, so it may not be working as well, or it’s taking my body some time to adjust. So the jury is still out on this count.
- Your mind will be clearer. Clearer than what? I still sit and stare at my computer at work trying to remember my password. It’s not all that difficult of a password, and I have to use it at least 50 times a day, but still, I sit and ask myself “What’s the password again?”. Not to mention I mistype it constantly. But I never did take typing lessons, so that part is understandable.
- You’ll have more energy. Maybe this goes along with the dreams and not sleeping well, but I am dead tired by 2PM every day. That makes going to gym in the evenings just about impossible.
- Your mood will be better. Seriously? The frustration level is through the roof. (See this post). Wifey is constantly reminding me to mellow out. And I need it. It seems the granddaughters and the stupid end-users at work get the brunt of my frustration. Sorry folks.
So having said all that, I still plan on going 30 days or so without beer to see if things clear up (7 days isn’t a long enough time for a valid test). I have dropped two pounds during this week, so maybe it will facilitate some weight/fat loss. And I’m sure some of this is age. I am getting to that special age where you go to bed just fine and wake up in stage 4 of something or other. As my brother says, “We ain’t spring chickens any more.” (Were we ever?)
I’ve posted the video that I stole the title for this post from below. I like this song a lot for several reasons. I really dig the cars; the General Lee from “Dukes of Hazard” and the Grand Torino from “Starskey and Hutch” (complete with requisite hood slide).
I also like the line;
“I wear my mind on my sleeve, I have a history of taking off my shirt.”
I really do feel like I’m losing my mind some (most) of the time.
And what about the line;
“I’m the kinda guy who laughs at a funeral”.
At my grandmother’s “viewing” (what a stupid concept – have a wake instead. Get drunk and tell stories. Not just walk up to the casket and say “He/She looks so natural”. They’re dead. (“He’s dead Jim!” ~ Bones McCoy) Say good-bye and go get a drink, and pour one into the coffin for the dearly departed as well. Can’t hurt.). Sorry, where was I? Oh yes, my grandmother’s viewing, we were in a small room in the funeral home off to one side. Apparently there was a rather large funeral going on in the main chapel. Even without the booze, a staff member had to come in several times to ask us to keep the laughing down. We were disturbing the funeral guests. We were just sitting around telling stories of Nanny, as we called her. Easily the best viewing of all time, hands down, if we had some booze we would probably been asked to leave. Hell, I’ve been thrown out of better establishments. I can’t wait for someone to say “He looks so natural” when I’m dead. I plan on being cremated, so if an urn of ashes looks “natural”, then I’m worse off than I thought.
So I present to you The Barenaked Ladies and “One Week”, enjoy! (And I can’t understand half the words either…)
I think somebody should have made me sign a waiver or something before I started this.