humor

It’s Gone Too Far (A.K.A. Jumping The Shark)

For those that are Twitter or Facebook buds (no? – why not? links below), you know of my “love” of anything pumpkin spiced.  For those new to the game, this expresses my “love” perfectly.

ps_ass

Anything pumpkin flavored sucks. Yes, this includes the pie…

So yesterday Wifey® and I were doing the weekly shopping, and lo and behold what do we see in the cereal aisle? Pumpkin Spice everywhere!

Seems that life has jumped the pumpkin spice shark…  So sad.  I’ll just leave you with this tidbit.

Pumpkin-Spice-tacos

Pumpkin Spice no! Tequila yes!

 

Peace,
B

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What’s Stuck In My Head – 5 October

This song has been going around and around for the better part of a month. I almost posted it before, but let it sit instead.  In the time that it’s been on hold, I found out some more cool things about the song.

First, it was written by Shel Silverstein, he of The Giving Tree, Where The Sidewalk Ends and so many other cartoons, books, albums, you name it.

It’s based on a true story. From the article on Songfacts;

In the song, Sylvia’s mother is Mrs. Avery, and while that wasn’t her real last name, the rest of the story – exaggerated a bit – was true. Silversteen told Rolling Stone in 1972: “I just changed the last name, not to protect the innocent, but because it didn’t fit. It happened about eight years ago and was pretty much the way it was in the song. I called Sylvia and her mother said, ‘She can’t talk to you.’ I said, ‘Why not?’ Her mother said she was packing and she was leaving to get married, which was a big surprise to me. The guy was in Mexico and he was a bullfighter and a painter. At the time I thought that was like being a combination brain surgeon and encyclopedia salesman. Her mother finally let me talk to her, but her last words were, ‘Shel, don’t spoil it.’ For about ten seconds I had this ego charge, as if I could have spoiled it. I couldn’t have spoiled it with a sledge hammer.”

It’s interesting to know that it was based on a true story because I always thought it could happen to me!

Dr. Hook is one of my favorite musicians. His style (and by that I mean the Medicine Show since there is no real Dr. Hook) has always intrigued me. And of course, the crazy hit (also penned by Shel Silverstein) The Cover Of  ‘Rolling Stone is absolutely hysterical! And it did land them on the cover.  Although only in caricature.

But back to our song, Silvia’s Mother.  I found two very humorous articles about the song. The first is from UnNews.

4 October 2008

Sylvia’s mother, Mrs. Avery, who famously prevented her daughter from continuing her relationship with eyepatch-wearing boyfriend Dr Hook, admitted yesterday to lying during the famous telephoneconversation.

For the first time in over 35 years, she came clean about the call that ended forever hopes of a reunion between Hook and Sylvia.

Yes, Sylvia’s mother lied. What a surprise.

The second is from Ultimate Classic Rock.  The article linked is an excerpt from Dear Mr. Pop Star, by English father-and-son team Derek and Dave Philpott.  This is a collection of Monty Python-like letters to artists and witty responses from a large number of targets. The book follows the project’s online success over the past 10 years.  It’s a “letter” written to Dr. Hook advising him what he should have done during the infamous phone call. The reply is written by Dr. Hook frontman Dennis Locorriere.  It’s quite entertaining. (Hint: Click the link above to read it…).

So that’s all I have for this entry.  Please enjoy the video, I have a feeling some folks may have never heard this track before.

Oh yeah, please leave your comments here if you can. Thanks!

Peace,
B

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DJ Tips

(Granted, techniques have changed since I was a DJ, but the basic idea of keeping the music and your comments as coherent as possible is timeless)

So yesterday as I was driving home from work (in the rain of course), listening to Classic Vinyl, and they played a clip of Graham Nash saying how underappreciated Stephen Stills is as a guitar player.  And I totally agree. Stephen, with his custom tunings, is an outstanding player. I love to listen to him play.

But here’s the issue. They play a clip about a guitar player and follow it up with what, Suite: Judy Blues Eyes, or maybe Southern Cross? Nope, they played Our House. Now don’t get me wrong, Our House is a wonderful song. But it’s a piano song – a guitar is not heard.

From the Wiki:

The song originates in a domestic event that took place while Graham Nash was living with Joni Mitchell (and her two cats) in her house on Laurel Canyon (Los Angeles), after they had gone out for breakfast and had bought an inexpensive vase on Ventura Boulevard. Nash wrote the song in an hour, on Mitchell’s piano.

In October 2013, in an interview with Terry Gross on NPR’s “Fresh Air”, Nash elaborated:

Well, it’s an ordinary moment. What happened is that Joni [Mitchell] and I – I don’t know whether you know anything about Los Angeles, but on Ventura Boulevard in the Valley, there’s a very famous deli called Art’s Deli. And we’d been to breakfast there. We’re going to get into Joan’s car, and we pass an antique store. And we’re looking in the window, and she saw a very beautiful vase that she wanted to buy… I persuaded her to buy this vase. It wasn’t very expensive, and we took it home. It was a very grey, kind of sleety, drizzly L.A. morning. And we got to the house in Laurel Canyon, and I said – got through the front door and I said, you know what? I’ll light a fire. Why don’t you put some flowers in that vase that you just bought? Well, she was in the garden getting flowers. That meant she was not at her piano, but I was… And an hour later ‘Our House’ was born, out of an incredibly ordinary moment that many, many people have experienced.

 

So, to get back on topic here. When you talk about a great guitar player you probably shouldn’t play a piano song right after. No matter how good that piano song is.

So here’s a live version of Suite: Judy Blue Eyes for you. Have a great Labor Day weekend for us in the USA or just a fabulous weekend everywhere else!

Peace,
B

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What’s Stuck In My Head

Welcome to a new series!  The “What’s Stuck In My Head” series will be, mostly, music, but will also have other items I can’t seem to shake. Maybe a news item (but not a lot of politics), art pieces, meme’s, books etc… In other words, totally random, just as the blog title says.

So going off of yesterday’s random music video post, today’s “What’s Stuck In My Head” is a comedy video. I picked what I believe to be one the greatest comedy skits of all time. Abbot & Costello’s Who’s On First.

I do hope you enjoy that skit as much as I do. Please leave me a comment or two, and maybe a recommendation of something to add to the series. I’d love to hear from you!

Peace,
B

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A Day That Will Live In Infamy

(No… not that one)

groucho001

On 19 August 1977 (41 years ago), we lost one of the greatest comedians of all time. Julius “Groucho” Marx. He was, at the least, the driving force behind the Marx Brothers comedy. Somewhere I have bootleg copies of all of their movies. A Night At The Opera, Cocoanuts, Animal Crackers, Duck Soup, and my favorite A Day At The Races. But I do have to admit that Cocoanuts, a story about the Florida land boom of the 1920’s is still very relevant today. Just read any of Carl Hiaasen’s “Skink” books or Tim Dorsey’s “Serge” books, and you can see they fit into the same mold.

Groucho has always been one of my favorites, from the grease paint mustache (said to have come about because he arrived late to set and didn’t have time to put the fake mustache on, or he hated taking off the fake one since it hurt!), the stooped over walk, and especially his always ready quick comebacks. To this day I still use one of his standards “Now that’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard!” (in a very poor imitation) in damn near every situation.

Some notable quotes:

I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.

Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend on reading it.

I sent the club a wire stating, “PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON’T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT PEOPLE LIKE ME AS A MEMBER”. (I have used this quote when giving lectures several times. My all time favorite.)

Source: https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Groucho_Marx

When he was turned down for membership to a country club due to being Jewish, it is rumored that he asked “Can my daughter go into the pool waist deep? She’s only half Jewish”.

I did watch reruns (I’m not THAT old!) of Groucho’s TV show You Bet Your Life,  and while at times very funny, the censors wouldn’t let most of his asides on air. A lot of the Marx Brothers’ movies were “pre-code”, meaning there wasn’t as much of the more risqué stuff cut. Naturally, there was no foul language or nudity, it was the 20’s and 30’s after all, but a lot more innuendo was allowed then.

Here is one source for some audio clips of all the Marx Brothers.  A quick search of YouTube turns up some great Groucho clips. Here’s one:

Peace,
B

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Not The Song I Want To Hear

music

For those just joining the party, a little history.  In a previous life, I have been a DJ. I worked at a country station, a big band station, and did mobile DJ work.  All in the early 80’s in and around Miami.

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On Crandon Park Beach.  Employee party for the T.G.I. Friday restaurant chain. With Reflections Productions.

Also in a previous life, I was a worship leader for several churches in the Daytona Beach area. I have been told that I was the “Christian Tom Petty” and that my voice was like the guy from Lady Antebellum. I take both as huge compliments.

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Long ago, in a universe far far away…

Now that we have that out-of-the-way…

What I came here to talk about today are artists/bands/songs that either make me turn up the volume or change the station.  This is not a comprehensive list and I ask for comments, both where you think I’m wrong and anything that could be added. And as I’m writing this post, Jethro Tull’s Aqua Lung is playing.  While I love this song (and the “follow-up” Locomotive Breath) Wifey® will leave the room when either play, and I’ll turn it up. So that’s a perfect kick off!

Stuff That Makes Me Change The Station

  • Anything, and I mean anything, by George Thorogood. There is just something about his whole style that I do not care for. And I love the blues in general, just not his version.
  • Along the same lines is Bruce Springsteen. But not every song, just most of them. Again it’s a style thing for me.
  • Almost anything from Lynyrd Skynyrd. Especially Free Bird. I will let Simple Man and Curtis Lowe play.  Growing up in Florida, they had to be the most overplayed band of my youth. Along with our next entry.
  • Led Zepplin. Again, they were like every third song on the radio. I’m so over them.

 

Stuff That Makes Me Turn Up The Volume

  • The Beatles. When my granddaughters on riding with me in my truck, we always have The Beatles channel on SiriusXM playing. But not too loud, don’t want their ears to get as bad as mine.
  • CCR.  I love John Fogerty’s style. Every one of their songs gets me rocking.
  • Crosby, Stills & Nash (with or without Young). Songs I learned to play very early. Although I could never quite get the right sound out of my guitar. It wasn’t until much later that I learned that Stephen Stills used an alternate tuning.
  • So we also need to add Neil Young as a solo artist. Wifey® doesn’t care for Mr. Young. Something about his voice. But I love his melodies, harmonies, and lyrics.
  • Just about any other “Southern Rock” band other than Skynyrd. Molly Hatchet (Especially their cover of Dreams), .38 Special, the Outlaws (High Tides and Green Grass), Marshall Tucker Band.
  • The Allman Brothers. Sure you could place them in the “Southern Rock” category, but they play the blues more, and better than the others. Is it odd that I like their instrumental works best? Melissa, Jessica, In Memory of Elizabeth Reed. Now that I’ve put that down, maybe it’s because they’re all named for women?
  • Bob Seger (except for Turn The Page, again way overplayed). But if  Main Street or Night Moves comes on, the volume goes up.
  • Eric Clapton. Doesn’t matter which band. The Yardbirds, John Mayall Blues Breakers, Cream, Derek & The Dominoes, or solo (even with Delany & Friends). His guitar soars above everything else. And that leads me to –
  • Steve Winwood. Just like Clapton, it doesn’t matter which group or solo. Spencer Davis Group (as “Little Stevie Winwood”), Traffic, Blind Faith etc, etc…
  • So lets put them together. Clapton and Winwood did a three-day gig at Madison Square Garden.  Has to be one of the best of all time. They covered each of their bands and other stuff. That cover of Jimi Hendrix’s Little Wing is my all time favorite.
  • Jimi Hendrix (oh nice segue there dude). Such an amazing guitar. Nothing else needs to be said.
  • The Monkees. Yeah, it’s bubblegum, but my very first album I was “More Of The Monkees”.  I watched the TV show every week. It was the one night I didn’t have to help with dishes! And, in my opinion, Michael Nesmith is a very talented musician. His music, both with and without The Monkees are some of my favorites.
  • Staying with the “pop” genre, let’s go with The Bangles. Great music, and easy to look at. Their cover of Simon & Garfinkle’s Hazy Shade of Winter is so much better than the original. But the video sucks.  Wifey® would add The Go-Go’s here, but they weren’t my favorite (but I do follow them on Twitter).
  •  Yes.  That’s the band there, not just some random exclamation. Such interesting melodies, not to mention Jon Anderson’s vocals! I also have several of Rick Wakeman’s solo albums. The Six Wives of Henry VIII is so out of this world, I used to blast it outside on Halloween night.
  • Heart. I have seen these ladies in concert three times. They put on a great show! I had a poster of (my wife to be – before I met Wifey®), Nancy Wilson in my bedroom.
  • The Who. Really anything by Pete Townsend. His style of blending guitar, keyboards and either his or Roger Daltry’s vocals are superb. It’s that “wall of sound” that gets me.

Stuff That Doesn’t Get Turned Up, But I Don’t Change The Station

  • Cat Stevens/Yusef.  His music saved me during those tough High School years. But I have to admit, I did turn up the volume now and then.
  • Dan Fogelberg. More music that saved me after those tough High School years. I tend to like the earlier stuff better.
  • Linda Ronstadt. Hers was the other poster up in my room. Her voice was what I fell asleep to most nights.
  • John Denver. Yes, John Denver. Just something about the folksy sound I really enjoyed. Except for Grandma’s Feather Bed et al…

As you can see, I have a lot more likes than dislikes. And I’m happy that I’m no longer behind the mic and have to play stuff I don’t care for, and pretend that I enjoy it.

I’m sure you can add others to both sides of this list. I didn’t go into much of 80’s music. But there are some I enjoyed, some I didn’t, and some that are hit and miss. I didn’t go into any Beatles solo projects either.  But I’ll save that for another post…

EDIT: My b

 

I’ll leave you with a video of Clapton & Winwood.  Enjoy!

Peace,
B

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Truth! (In Advertising??)

Let’s talk about a strange, but very interesting, ad. I don’t know if this commercial runs outside of the USA, so for reference here it is:

So let’s pick this apart shall we?

First, while it is true that text messages are being broadcast into space, after all everything that has ever been broadcast by humans has been sent into space. How do you think aliens are learning our anatomy & physiology? They’re not abducting us and doing rectal probes. They’re watching all the p0rn and sexting messages were sending out. Basically, aliens have as much of a screwed up expectations of our sex lives as a 16 year-old boy.

Second, if you were the astronaut in space, do you think you’d actually be monitoring text messages? I won’t even go into the lack of a lag it the messages. I know here on earth, my texts don’t get delivered in real-time. Can you imagine the bounces a message would have to take to finally make it to someone in space?

Next, both of characters are in a night-time scene. This would mean that the “space station” she is working on is close to the terrestrial location the guys is locked out of his car. That would indicate that the station is in a geosynchronous orbit. But the space station isn’t in that type of orbit. In fact it makes a complete orbit around the earth about every 90 minutes. So they would both see the same moon for a very short time.

Lastly, if one member of a couple is an astronaut I think they could afford something a bit more fitting of the astronaut’s earning capabilities than a Hyundai.

But that’s just my opinions.

Can you find any other “not quite right” moments in this commercial, or any others? Leave a comment if you do (or feel free to pick apart my pseudo-science).

Peace,
B

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Nothing To See Here

Just here to post this meme son-the-elder sent me.

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This is relevant because my boss has pugs. Whenever he gets sick we say he has the “pug flu”.  I will admit that pugs are not my cup of tea but to each his own. Also, man buns are without a doubt the stupidest haircut for men since the mullet.

Peace,
B

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They Treat Me Like Family

Obviously, that is a clip from the hit TV show “The Big Bang Theory”. Just in case you’ve been living under a rock for the last 11 years or so, here is the Wikipedia page for the show.

I don’t watch much television. Wifey® on the other hand, watches a lot. But I do enjoy this show. The basic characters are, of course, over the top representations of your average science nerd.

Let’s look at this clip for a moment. What if a restaurant really did “Treat You Like Family”? In my opinion that would mean;

  • No menu. You would get whatever the hell the cook made that night. And you’d like it!
  • You would have to serve yourself. Go get your own refills and such.
  • The usual response to “pass me the salt, pepper, ketchup, whatever” would be “Get up and get it yourself!” Well, at least at my house that’s the usual.
  • You wouldn’t have to pay! Now that’s a good point. But it’s also a bad idea, as the venue would not be around very long.

What else would make it “like family” for you? Leave me a comment below.

Peace,
B

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True Stories From The Workbench – Part II

(True Stories From The Workbench – Part I)

Here are a couple more stories of the odd things we techie types run into now and then.

The year was around 2001, I was doing in-home/office computer work. I went to the home of a doctor that was having a very minor issue. If I remember correctly (which at my age is questionable), it only took me about 15 minutes to fix the issue. While she was writing out my check, she asked me what I did to fix the PC. I didn’t get more than a handful of words out in reply when she interrupted me with “No! Don’t tell me. You may push something out of my brain that I need”.  Now I may have only been a paramedic back in the day, but I’m pretty sure that’s not the way the brain works. I was hoping she was joking, but she looked really serious. I just let it go.

Just this past week: We use Micro$oft SharePoint here at work. (No I am not a fan). It is set (and cannot be changed) as the default homepage for both Internet Exploder Explorer and Chrome web browsers. We also have it set that the login cookie (that’s what saves your username and password) expires at a set time. This means that every now and then you will have to re-enter your login credentials to continue. So, we get a HellDesk ticket “SharePoint is asking me to log in and I don’t know what to do!”  Uh… Maybe enter your username and password and login? You know, follow the damn instructions!!!

Have any stories you’d like to share?

And this video has nothing to do with anything in this post. But it showed up all on its own, so I think it’s an omen.

Peace,
B

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